So I will just sit down and see whether inspiration comes as Sam Ryder suggested yesterday. I can't pretend that I don't have a few subjects up my sleeve to discuss when I'm a bit short of natural inspiration.
So today I will pluck one of those out of the air and see where it takes me. So many people have commented on how do I keep going with the blog every day? Well that's because most of it is mindless nonsense with the occasional smattering or splattering of sense.
So subjects I have stored up include smoking, Samaritans and hyperhidrosis. Perhaps today isn't the day to discuss excessive sweating or social conscience, so let's try smoking.
On Tuesday I had a long chat with Richard Bond at the Queen's Head for a feature for the EDP newspaper and Hethersett Herald. Richard is just over a week away from completing 20 years at the pub and had some interesting things to say which you will have to wait until I burst into print to find out about.
However, one thing he talked about was how hard the pub was hit when smoking was banned indoors. It is difficult to imagine today going into a pub or restaurant that is heavy with cigarette smoke, but my older readers will well remember coming home from the pub with their clothes reeking of smoke and, in my case, their eyes running.
How unhealthy was all that passive smoking?
My parents both smoked. My mother smoked cigarettes and my father a pipe and we never thought much of it. I don't think either smoked to excess but I suppose it was a product of having lived through the war years and also the advertising which at that time made it sound "cool" to smoke. In fact some adverts claimed that smoking was good for your health - which just shows how propaganda can have a real affect (or is that effect - I never know, perhaps someone can enlighten me).
Richard told me that when the smoking ban came in pubs, it severely affected his trade for some time and took a while to get back to normal. Now, of course we don't give smoke free environments a second-thought. They are just a given and I doubt anybody would want to return to those days of clothes smelling, eyes watering misery.
But growing up it was very different. Wherever you went there was smoke and nobody questioned it. Smoking was allowed upstairs on buses. Who remembers those metal stubbers where you could stub out your fags, probably dropping ash onto the person sitting next to you? The smoke would go upwards, hit the ceiling of the bus which was only around 6 foot and then rebound into clothes, bags etc. This made bus journeys unpleasant. Downstairs you couldn't smoke but downstairs on crowded buses was equally uncomfortable with people standing.
In thos days you got on a bus at the back rather than the front. You accessed upstairs from the back and there was a conductor who issued tickets from a machine slung round his waist (it was always a him and never a her). Tickets were printed after he had twiddled a few knobs on the top. Conductors usually shouted out the names of stops and only conductors were allowed to press the small red buttons which I seem to remember were on the roof of the downstairs or upstairs. I can't remember how you indicated that you wanted to get off at a particular stop, other than walking down the stairs whilst the bus was in motion and standing in the stairwell. The driver was in a cocooned world all of his own (again it was always a he and never a she) within his driving cab which was not accessible to the rest of the bus. If things kicked off it was the conductor that had to deal with any problem.
Occasionally a dreaded Inspector would get on and check tickets. I was never sure whether this personage was checking passengers or the conductor. If you want to get a flavour of how things were have a look at the comedy series On The Buses on You Tube or CD.
But back to cigarette smoke. Remember hotel rooms? You could smell the smoke as soon as you entered them and you had to fling the windows wide open, which wasn't great in the depths of winter. There used to be non smoking rooms but often these weren't smoke free either.
Then there was smoking at sports events which was dangerous as well as uncomfortable and of course sport was often sponsored by tobacco companies. I well remember the John Player Cricket League and I think snooker was sponsored by cigarette companies as well.
Then slowly but surely smoking became anti-social. I supported the efforts of ASH to have smoking banned in public places.
So how many cigarettes have I smoked? Well none in the past 45 years but about 30 before that. Yes I tried it, didn't enjoy it, saw the problems it could cause and decided I wasn't going to do it. Apart from being bad for your health, it was also bad for your pocket as well.
As I began writing this I had absolutely no idea how much 20 cigarettes now costs. So I had to look it up on the internet. I was gobsmacked to find a pack will set you back £10.50 or more. Smoking 20 a day is really nothing for hardened smokers. So that equates to over £73 a week or over £300 a month or over £3,600 a year. Each fag costs over 50p. That's insane and I can't help thinking about the satirical song about smoking by American Bob Newhart entitled Walter Raleigh. It's a guy having a telephone conversation with Walter Raleigh and rather puts everything into perspective.
Tob-acco... er, what's tob-acco, Walt?...
It's a kind of leaf, huh?...
And you bought eighty tonnes of it!...
Let me get this straight, Walt, you've bought eighty Tonnes of leaves? This may come as a kind of a surprise To you Walt but come fall in England, we're kinda up to Our...
It isn't that kind of leaf, huh?...
Oh!, what kind is it then... some special kind of Food?...
Not exactly?...
Oh, it has a lot of different uses, like, what are some Of the uses, Walt?...
Are you saying 'snuff', Walt?...
What's snuff?...
You take a pinch of tobacco, ha! ha! ha!...
And you shove it up your nose. ha! ha! ha!...
And it makes you sneeze? ha! ha! ha!...
Yeah, I imagine it would,
It has other uses though, huh?...
You can chew it!...
Or put it in a pipe!...
Or you can shred it up...
And put it in a piece of paper. ha! ha! ha!...
And roll it up. ha ha ha...
Don't tell me, Walt, don't tell me. ha! ha! ha! you Stick it in your ear, right? ha! ha! ha!...
Oh! between your lips!...
Then what do you do, Walt? ha! ha! ha!...
You set fire to it! ha! ha! ha!...
Then what do you do, Walt?...Ha! ha! ha! You inhale the smoke, huh! ha! ha! ha!...
You know, Walt... it seems you can stand in front of Your own fireplace and have the same thing going for You!
You see, Walt... we've been a little worried about you,
Y'know, ever since you put your cape down over that Mud.
Y'see, Walt... I think you're gonna have rather a tough Time selling people on sticking burning leaves in their Mouths...
It's going very big over there, is it?...
What's the matter, Walt?...
You spilt your what?...
Your coff-ee?.
What's coffee
Yes tobacco was indeed discovered by Sir Walter Raleigh - he of the cloak over a puddle for the Queen. He discovered potatoes as well. I wanted to say invented them but that would be incorrect. Actually they were discovered much earlier but Walt (and I hope he doesn't mind me being rather familiar with his name) took them to Ireland and planted them on his estate and so he was partially responsible for the dreaded potato famine.
As I have already mentioned smoking was once looked upon as being cool. The coolest actors, the coolest entertainers were often seen dragging on cigarettes and smoking was depicted as being totally natural on television, in magazines etc. Now it's thought of more as a disgusting habit. How customs and what is acceptable change.
Well that's what I came up with today. I would love to have some of your memories of smoking growing up (and even bus travel).