They particularly dislike blogs. How do I know this? Well I have written a blog twice in the past couple of days and each time it has disappeared.
It's probably because I'm writing about a place that the Ghosts of York know well - Lemmingland.
There are many Lemminglands in the UK and probably throughout the world. They are evil places. the haunt of the undead and probably better known as factory outlets or shopping centres.
They are usually viewed during public holidays such as Christmas and Easter.
"I'm bored. Where can we go today?"
"Let's go to Lemmingland?"
Now this peculiar place usually consists of hundreds of shops all selling things they don't need to people that don't need them. There's only one rule in Lemmingland. The car parks have to be small enough to ensure that only the early birds get spaces. The rest just have to grin and bear it, sitting in a two mile traffic queue and then playing the old British game of hunt the parking space safe in the knowledge that when one suddenly appears somebody else will come the wrong way down a one way road and nick it.
"Oi that's my space."
"Bugger off mate spaces aren't booked."
So we went to MacArthur Park (Sorry Macarthur Glen) just outside York which is prime Lemmingland country, so called because rational people become Lemmings and follow each other off the edge of the cliff, or in this case through the doors of the retail outlets.
We managed to park under a tree on a load of leaves. Others parked on verges up to half a mile away - such was the Lemmingology of the day (The science of following everyone else like Lemmings).
I always wonder how many of the thousands of people actually want to be there and how many are there because they have nothing else to do and have a day off work and just have to get out of the house before another Christmas Movie comes on.
And talking of Christmas. It's over everyone, but shops are still playing festive music. "It will soon be Christmas Day" was the lyric of one song I heard yesterday. But, I cried, we are about 360 days away from Christmas Day - you can't get much further away than that.
Firework displays are also a primary activity in Lemmingland. You drive for an hour, join a queue, park on some dodgy piece of wasteland which charges you the earth, stand shivering for an hour and then spend two hours trying to get home in traffic jams. All for 10 to 15 minutes of fireworks that look like every other firework display that you have ever been to.
Sporting events can also take place in Lemmingland. You drive for five hours to the other side of the country, park miles away from say a football ground, sit in the cold for over and hour and then do it all in reverse and all for 90 minutes of what is termed entertainment but what in reality can be dreadfully boring.
But back to the Ghosts. In the Shambles in York there is a ghost shop, It's so popular that you have to queue to get in. It sells miniature ghosts in what is thought to be the most haunted city in Europe.
Year ago we used to hire a house in York in the run up to Christmas. Every night the official city ghost tour would stop outside and a gentleman dressed in top hat and tails would regale the public with stories of headless horsemen, women burnt at the stake and much more.
Now more than two decades later there's this official ghost store which according to the Media is:
"located in the former Pinder and Scott’s bakery shop at number 6 Shambles and stocks unique ghost-related souvenirs for visitors to take home.
"The shop has been created and designed by David Bloodworthy and Angus Mcarthur, who said it aims to tell the story of ghost making, which dates back more than 600 years."
We missed the shop but I think some kind of ghostly presence has twice wiped out my blog. On both occasions I hit a button and everything disappeared. At least if you are reading this my latest blog will have survived.
Perhaps next time we'll take home a Ghost - providing the fad is still going and the owners haven't taken off into the sunset with their profits.
There's a department store in York by the name of Fenwick's. It's quite an upmarket expensive store and I always like to look at prices. There was an Eames chair with matching Ottoman (footstall to me and you) and it was in the sale at 15% off. The original price was £8,900! Even I have to use an exclamation mark here and I have to say that I hate them. Printers used to refer to them as dog's cocks. I have no idea why. But people wanting to make a point use multiple exclamation marks in a row which seems absolutely ridiculous. Whinge over.
Anyway the sign on the chair informed us that the Eames chair is a classic design beloved across the globe as an example of sophistication.
"When you walk into a room and see an Eames chair you immediately feel at home." Quite frankly I wouldn't know an Eames chair from an IKEA chair but then I am a bit of a Philistine, or put another way if I had £9000 I wouldn't spend it on a chair.
The York art shop was much more to my liking. Everything was half price but not because they had a sale. No it was a vicious side-swipe at the Government. There was a big notice in the window explaining that the art was half price. It blamed Government ineptitude and mismanagement for severely hitting the sale of non essential goods.
I felt that was a nice turn of phrase and summed up so much. Our Government is skilled in ineptitude and mismanagement.
I took a load of photos of York which I will include with tomorrow's blog.
Oh I forgot to mention the queue outside Betty's tea rooms - a brilliant example of Lemmingland in action. We estimated that the people at the back of the queue would be waiting somewhere between half an hour and an hour to get in.
And once in what are they faced with - £6.99 for a mince pie and £4 for a cup of filter coffee. This definitely gets my Lemmingworld Oscar. Queue for and hour and then pay £11 for coffee and a mince pie. Who said times are hard?e to edit.