You never know what you will get as you open the door to your room. Sometimes it's a pleasant surprise and on others you just feel like going yuck.
Most of course are bog standard instantly forgettable rooms. But four stick out in our minds for being particularly horrible.
The worst was in the centre of Amsterdam. It was when I was with the police and was booked by my counterpart in Amsterdam. The room was very small but the main problem was it was over a very loud disco which went on until 3 am after which we couldn't get to sleep. We booked out and found an alternative in a leafy suburb for the rest of our stay.
Then there was an appalling room in Hanoi where everything was either broken or didn't work.
Third worst was a room in Paris so small you couldn't swing the proverbial cat. Then Anne mentioned an awful room in Scotland which she complained about. She booked it through the Telegraph newspaper which made it sound wonderful. I don't remember this at all but must take her word for it. She also remembers an awful breakfast with porridge made from water. Again I have no recollection. When we got home she complained to the Telegraph and they sent her a pen as compensation.
To redress the balance we must remember the best rooms three of which were in China. The first was in Shanghai and was mainly memorable for the most wonderful breakfast which included champagne. The second was on the 35th floor of a hotel in Beijing with great views. The third and the best of the lot was in Xian where we went to see the Terracotta army. This was a German owned hotel and our guide told us we would be impressed. We weren't pressed by the outside which looked more like a prison. But when we opened the door. Wow. The bathroom was bigger than most bedrooms and the bedroom was massive. Unfortunately we were only there one night. Apparently it had lovely views over a lake but we couldn't see them due to smog.
Honourable mentions to rooms in Florida and Las Vegas and one somewhere in Kent. Can't remember exactly where or why we were there but again it was big. Oh and mustn't forget one on Jersey that had three rooms and the same number of televisions.
Ultimately I suppose all we ask for is a comfortable, clean and quiet room and that's what we got in Penzance.
So onto the Scilly Isles. There's bucketloads of them. There's the Silly Isle and the smaller which is known as the Not So Silly Isle and the larger known as The Very Silly Isle and others like the Quite Silly Isle. The Particularly Silly Isle and the Learning to Be Silly Isle where would be residents go to learn how to be Silly so that they can eventually live on the best one which is known as the Completely Silly Isle.
Ok I made that lot up and I know that it's spelt Scilly. We have been there a couple of times which almost makes me a Silly Person.
The main town on St Mary's is Hugh Town which is obviously a Silly name. Yes I'm going to keep on with the Scilly (silly) jokes in a Month Python kind of way.
Who was Hugh Town. Well I suspect his surname wasn't Town at all and of course I'm not allowed to pose questions without providing the answers as well.. so answer tomorrow.