All I would have to do each day is glide beautifully down the river and then dive for food to the delight of humans on the riverbank who laugh when they see my bum in the air.
The only decision I have to make is whether to leave this piece of concrete and have a glide downstream and occasionally repel an attack from another swan who tries to bite my beautiful neck.
Mind you being a swan would be rather boring. No news about Boris and Dominic Cummins to think about, no decisions to be made about which of them is the more childish.
Boris was educated at Eton and today you will find plenty of photos of the town and college from our recent visit.
To me there are two types of England and I must admit I prefer the first although it might lead to you referring to me as a fuddy duddy.
You see I seem to be rooted in the past - both from an history and a traditional point of view. I like walking around Eton seeing the rather strangely dressed pupils - after all standards have to be maintained.
I do admire and am slightly jealous of schools like Eton and Harrow and universities like Oxford and Cambridge. They are institutions and communities as well as places of learning. Thankfully I did experience this a bit by being educated!!!! at the Norwich School in the Cathedral Close which certainly has community values.
The other side of England is the very unhistoric pace of modern life. Horrible things like crawling round the M25.
Our stay in Windsor included a two hour trip down the Thames taking in some spectacular and monumentally expensive properties along the riverbank - think around £20 million here.
I was intrigued to be told that one was originally owned by Sir Michael Caine who sold it to Led Zeppelin guitarist Jimmy Page. It was the Old Mill House. Caine sold it for £900,000 in 1980. Tragically Led Zeppelin drummer John Bonham died there just after Page bought it. Page sold the house, bought it again and sold it again - probably couldn't make up his mind whether he wanted to live there.
Bonham's death was a sad affair. The following details come from Wikipedia:
On 24 September 1980, Bonham was picked up by Led Zeppelin assistant Rex King to attend rehearsals at Bray Studios for a tour of North America, to begin 17 October in Montreal, Canada – the band's first since 1977. During the journey, Bonham asked to stop for breakfast, where he drank four quadruple vodka screwdrivers. He then continued to drink heavily after arriving at rehearsals. The band stopped rehearsing late in the evening and then went to Page's house, the Old Mill House ii Clewer, Windsor. After midnight on 25 September, Bonham fell asleep; someone took him to bed and placed him on his side. Led Zeppelin tour manager Benji LeFevre and John Paul Jones found him unresponsive the next afternoon. Bonham was later pronounced dead at 32 years old
Bray Studios are a short distance from the Old Mill. Hundreds of famous film and television programmes have been recorded there including the BBC adaptation of Dracula and the Elton John biopic Rocketman. Special effects for Doctor Who were also sorted there.
One of the other properties we passed was once owned by Australian singer and actress Natalie Imbruglia. Imbruglia's album, White Lilies Island was named after where she lived on this stretch of the Thames.
The boat turned round at Bray which is also famous - this time in the culinary world. It has two triple Michelin starred restaurant which is apparently more than the whole of the rest of London.
Apologies for the state of some of the photos which were taken from a moving boat. They are of Eton and Windsor and the River Thames.